How to Say 'How Are You?' & 'I'm Sorry' in German: The 'Es' & Dative Explained

Hello everyone!

Two of the most common and essential phrases in any language are "How are you?" and "I'm sorry." In German, however, there's a slight grammatical twist that often confuses learners: the person involved isn't the subject of the sentence!

In this post, we'll dive into exactly how these sentences are constructed, why German does it this way, and how you can correctly use them for different people (dir - you, ihm - him, Ihnen - you formal, etc.). Let's master these everyday, yet crucial, structures!

"Wie geht es?" - Asking How Someone Is

In English, we say "How are you?". The subject is "you". German approaches this differently.

The basic, general question is: Wie geht es? (How's it going? / How are things?)

To ask a specific person how they are, you need that person's dative pronoun:

Wie geht es dir? (How are you? - informal, singular)
Wie geht es ihm? (How is he?)
Wie geht es ihr? (How is she?)
Wie geht es uns? (How are we?)
Wie geht es euch? (How are you? - informal, plural)
Wie geht es ihnen? (How are they?)
Wie geht es Ihnen? (How are you? - formal, singular/plural)

The Grammar Twist: In these German sentences, the person isn't the subject. The impersonal pronoun es (it) is the subject! The verb is gehen (here meaning "to go" in the sense of "how things are faring"). The person whose well-being is being asked about is in the Dative case (answering the question "To whom is it going well/badly?").

A very literal translation of "Wie geht es dir?" would be something like "How does it go to you?". This sounds strange in English but shows the German structure.

Answering "Wie geht es...?"

The answer follows the same grammatical pattern:

Danke, mir geht es gut. (Thanks, I am fine.) -> Subject: es, Dative object: mir (to me)
Ihm geht es nicht so gut. (He is not doing so well.) -> Dative object: ihm (to him)
Uns geht es super! (We are doing great!) -> Dative object: uns (to us)
Es geht. / Es geht so. (So-so. / Okay.) - A neutral answer, often without the dative pronoun.

In spoken German, this is often shortened: Mir geht's gut. (instead of Mir geht es gut.).

Asking Yes/No Questions

To ask *if* someone is doing well, put the verb first:

Geht es dir gut? (Are you okay?)
Geht es ihm besser? (Is he feeling better?)
Geht es Ihnen gut? (Are you okay? - formal)

"Es tut mir leid." - Expressing Regret

We see the exact same grammatical structure here as with "Wie geht es?". In English, we say "I am sorry". The subject is "I". In German, once again, es is the subject.

The standard phrase is: Es tut mir leid.

The verb here is leidtun (or written separately: leid tun). It means "to be sorry" or, more literally, "to cause sorrow/regret". The person feeling the regret is again in the Dative case.

The Grammar Twist: Es (it) is the subject, tut leid is the predicate (from the verb leidtun), and mir (to me) is the dative object (To whom does it cause sorrow?).

A very literal translation of "Es tut mir leid." is something like "It does sorrow to me.".

Variations and Questions

Naturally, you can also ask if someone else is sorry, or why:

Tut es dir leid? (Are you sorry?)
Tut es ihm wirklich leid? (Is he really sorry?)
Tut es Ihnen leid, was passiert ist? (Are you sorry for what happened? - formal)
Warum tut es ihr leid? (Why is she sorry?)
Wem tut es leid? - Mir tut es leid. (Who is sorry? - I am sorry.)

Quick Reference: Dative Pronouns in Action

Here’s a summary table showing the dative pronouns used in these phrases:

Person (Nominative / Dative)	Example with "gehen"	Example with "leidtun"
ich / mir (I / to me)	Wie geht es `mir`? / `Mir` geht es gut.	`Mir` tut es leid.
du / dir (you / to you - inf.)	Wie geht es `dir`? / Geht es `dir` gut?	Tut es `dir` leid?
er / ihm (he / to him)	Wie geht es `ihm`? / `Ihm` geht es schlecht.	Tut es `ihm` leid?
es / ihm (it / to it)	Wie geht es `ihm` (dem Tier)? / `Ihm` geht es gut.	(Less common for 'it' to be sorry)
sie / ihr (she / to her)	Wie geht es `ihr`? / Geht es `ihr` besser?	Warum tut es `ihr` leid?
wir / uns (we / to us)	Wie geht es `uns`? / `Uns` geht es prima.	`Uns` tut es leid, das zu hören.
ihr / euch (you / to you - inf. pl.)	Wie geht es `euch`? / Geht es `euch` gut?	Tut es `euch` leid?
sie / ihnen (they / to them)	Wie geht es `ihnen`? / `Ihnen` geht es gut.	Tut es `ihnen` leid?
Sie / Ihnen (You / to You - formal)	Wie geht es `Ihnen`? / Geht es `Ihnen` gut?	Tut es `Ihnen` leid?

Note: The dative pronoun for "they" is ihnen (lowercase), while the dative pronoun for the formal "You" is Ihnen (uppercase). They look similar but context and capitalization distinguish them.

Why Does German Use This Structure?

This "impersonal" construction using es as the subject and the person as a dative object is common in German for verbs or expressions describing a state, feeling, or perception that 'happens to' a person or is experienced by them, rather than an action the person actively performs.

Other common examples include: Mir ist kalt/warm. (I am cold/warm - literally "To me is cold/warm."), Mir ist schlecht. (I feel sick - "To me is bad."), Mir gefällt das. (I like that - "It pleases me.").

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Conclusion: Getting a Feel for the Dative

Even though the grammar behind "Wie geht es dir?" and "Es tut mir leid." differs significantly from English, these are absolutely fundamental German phrases. The key takeaway is understanding the structure: Es + Verb + Dative Pronoun (+ Adverb/Rest).

Memorize the dative pronouns (mir, dir, ihm, ihr, uns, euch, ihnen, Ihnen) and practice using them in these contexts. With a little practice, this structure will start to feel much more natural!

Want to learn more about the dative case and other essential German grammar topics? Check out Sprachlingua's online German courses – we help you speak German confidently and correctly.

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Viel Erfolg beim Üben! (Good luck with practicing!)